Now, Calvin knows how to feel infinite :).
This is the darkness that comes after midnight, when zombies drink their daily coffees and crickets perform their operas well within the walls of overgrown summer grasses. When closing your eyes for more than 10 minutes is normal and when all my demon’s faces look the same.
I used to carry a red wooden heart that hung in place of my real one to remind me why I need a flashlight. To remind me that even though my eyes are disabled, I can still hear a faint steady beat off in the who knows where.
I swear I had it when I had no sense of time, when days ran into each other like confused but happy painters. Maybe I lost it when I realized that time controls me, when I realized that twenty-four hours is a sick lie, when I realized that twenty-four hours are actually twenty-four seconds.
Why the hell did no one warn me about this?
No one ever told me there was something darker than midnight. They never told me about how heavy you would feel when you wore a fake wooden heart. Why didn’t I know? How didn’t I know?
I guess that’s what darkness does. It hides the scary things, but just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there.
I need a flashlight so I know what I’m walking into. I need it in order to find my drum. I need it. I need it. I need a flashlight to find life source. I need my heart.
I love it for many reasons:
- The lyrics are adorable!
- The subtitles are hilarious :D.
- These two kids go to/went to Berklee College of Music!
Berklee is my dream school and to see these guys making music the way they do gives me so much hope. They are living proof of the kind of musician I want to be.
Happy listening :).
They say I’m young, but my thoughts are like retired concert performers, cracking their knuckles with arthritis caused by overuse. Surrounded by empty velvet chairs, waiting for someone to pay attention to them.
I am a camera. One of the plastic ones my grandma used back in the 60’s. Tangible yet living forever within the walls of brightly colored plastic. My thoughts are hidden, wound up inside, waiting for someone to show me the light.
Carnegie Hall, don’t expect me anytime soon. As much as I would like to meet you, I have unfinished business to attend to. There are stories to be told, pictures to be drawn, adventures to be discovered.
I’m not done yet.
I’m not done yet.
I promise you, I’m far from done.
This week’s tune for ya’ll is Hollywood by Michael Buble!!!
I love this man. I repeat, I love this man. He sings like a dream and look at this video! It is filled with hilarity! Man, this just made me so happy. Look at me, I’m speechless! I’m rambling! Ah!
Okay, I’m gonna leave now… Goodbye ;).
I think it is a work of fate when I come across something that seems like it was made just for me at just this time. Does that ever happen to you?
I just came across this poem and I think it is beautiful. It is written by the ingenious e.e. Cummings, one of my favorite poets because of his unique formats and vocal writing. His poems seem to just speak to you and only you. That is especially true for this little masterpiece:
You Are Tired (I Think) by e.e. Cummings
You are tired,
Of the always puzzle of living and doing;
And so am I.
Come with me, then,
And we’ll leave it far and far away—
(Only you and I, understand!)
You have played,
And broke the toys you were fondest of,
And are a little tired now;
Tired of things that break, and—
So am I.
But I come with a dream in my eyes tonight,
And knock with a rose at the hopeless gate of your heart—
Open to me!
For I will show you the places Nobody knows,
And, if you like,
The perfect places of Sleep.
Ah, come with me!
I’ll blow you that wonderful bubble, the moon,
That floats forever and a day;
I’ll sing you the jacinth song
Of the probable stars;
I will attempt the unstartled steppes of dream,
Until I find the Only Flower,
Which shall keep (I think) your little heart
While the moon comes out of the sea.
Ah, pure beauty I tell you, pure beauty.
Hearts, hugs, and dreamful sleep,
And in that moment, I swear we were infinite.
Infinite Playlist (play this as you read 🙂 )
- You Are Loved by Josh Groban
- I Giorni by Ludovico Einaudi
- Angels and Demons by Miccoli
- While My Guitar Gently Weeps by the Beatles
If you’ve never read the Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky, I suggest you dash over to your local library or bookstore and pick it up RIGHT NOW. Seriously, stop reading this little blog post and get your butts out of the house and into these pages of pure genius. If you have read this wonderful book, or you’re just too lazy to get up (it’s okay, I know how you feel), keep reading :).
Perks is filled to the brim with profound sentences and thoughts that when reading it the first time through, I could hardly contain myself. One of my favorite lines is the one I’ve put nicely at the top of the post with fancy quote formatting schtuff.
Infinite. What is it like to feel infinite? I won’t give away any of the story, but I feel like feeling infinite is something that is to each his/her own. Feeling the best ever, feeling extremely happy, feeling like the world just slows around you and suddenly you see things you’ve never seen before. It’s kinda like love, you don’t know it ’til you feel it. Now, this totally sounds like a drug trip, but I promise you that this is a different type of high. It’s a high on life.
It’s by this feeling that I hold my standard for life. Everything I do, everything I feel is compared to feeling infinite. Having that standard so high often puts me in sort of a rut. But that’s okay, the best is yet to come :). At least I’d like to hope so.
Fortunately, there are a number of things in this world that make me feel infinite. Kung fu, kids, and helping people are just among the many things that make me feel I am the happiest person in the world. But, at the top of all that is music. Making, performing, writing music. My ultimate goal of infinity is, sometime before I die, to be able to make and spread my music to people all over.
A dream shared by many, I am well aware. It’s hard road. But for something that makes me feel the way I do about it, I’ll take the car crashes any day. Some people say I set my sights waaaay too high, and yeah, I guess I do. But who would I be if I couldn’t dream? I certainly wouldn’t be Trish. Except this time, this isn’t merely a dream. This is my future.
To all those who may feel discouraged: I have a little present for you. Read this. It gave me so much hope and a newfound strength to overcome anything.
I hope you all find your infinity.
Have you ever seen a video, painting, photo, or piece of writing and just thought, “Oh my goodness… Oh my goodness. Oh my gosh that is so amazing”?
Yes. All the time. All. the. freaking. time.
We are so lucky to live in a generation that has one of the most powerful tools ever: the world wide web. Because of the Internet, us dreamers have a multitude of creativity at our disposal. Thank God for the Internet and the community of people that is here to create and share. It really is a beautiful thing.
One of the places that provides beautiful pieces of work is Youtube. Yes, Youtube. Among hilarious videos of demon babies and piano-playing cats are amazing works of art. Here are a few that got me through the week.
SHELL by Wong Fu Productions
I’ve been a long-time fan of Wong Fu. Their beautiful and heartfelt videos are just as amazing as their funny ones. Shell, in particular, is so touching in a way that is indescribable.
How to Be Alone by Andrea Dorfman and Tanya Davis
You might have already seen this, but it is worth mentioning for obvious reasons. “How to Be Alone” is jam packed with beautiful words and imagery that it’s pretty hard to not feel all fuzzy after watching it.
Oh my goodness. I cried so much after watching this video. Watch it. I bet you will too.
It is pieces of art like this that make me feel so inspired and high on life. This is another beautiful story (that I also cried at the end of).